Dealing With Adversity
by, Corey Wells

No matter who you are, at one time or another you’ve had to deal with adversity. We’ve all experienced times when nothing seems to go right. Whether it’s surviving a crisis, dealing with an unexpected setback or any number of possible occurrences. If you can name a problem, it’s happen to us or someone we know.

Today, we live in a society where blaming is pretty much the norm. We blame our parents, we blame the politicians, we blame our employers, we blame our customers, we blame the weather, and so on. But if we want to overcome our adversities, we need to change our attitudes and outlook. Instead of looking at adversity as something that was “done to us” by something or someone else, we need to identify it as a blameless event that we can learn a positive lesson from. Instead of saying; “Why am I the victim of such adversity?” ask yourself “What can I learn from this?

By changing our outlook, we’ll find we have better responses and a much better outcome. It’s not the problem but rather your response to the problem that’s important. By coming up with new responses, we’ll be free from the previous response patterns that have always limited our progress. If we can look at adversity as just an impersonal experience, we’ll soon discover that overcoming it is nothing more than choosing a different way to experience the situation.

One of the greatest thoughts on adversity I’ve ever heard comes from the late professor Randy Pausch who was dying of pancreatic cancer and said, “We can’t change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand.” I think this sums up dealing with adversity perfectly.

Let’s get started.

1. “All virtues come down to courage, at the sharp end of the sword. But courage must be tempered by prudence. Courage wasted by misdirection is the most heart-breaking of all tragedies. If there is an eighth deadly sin, it ought to be stupidity, by which all virtues run out into dry sands. Yet…where does prudence end and cowardice begin? That’s a very good damn question!”
   -Lois McMaster Bujold,
2. “Every man hath a good and a bad angel attending on him in particular all his life long.”
   -Robert Burton,
3. Never underestimate the importance of having fun. I’m dying and I’m having fun. And I’m going to keep having fun every day, because there’s no other way to play it.
   -Randy Pausch
4. “Grief and tragedy and hatred are only for a time. Goodness, remembrance and love have no end.”
   -George W. Bush,
5. “Justice while she winks at crimes,
   Stumbles on innocence sometimes.”
   -Samuel Butler
6. “A real thinker is one of the rarest things in nature. He comes only at long intervals in human history, and when he does come, he is often astonishingly unwelcome. Indeed, he is sometimes speedily sent the way of the unfit and unprotesting earthworm.”
   -Nicholas Murray Butler,
7. “Until you walk a mile in another man’s moccasins you can’t imagine the smell.”
   -Robert Byrne,
8. ” “Adversity is the first path to truth.”
   -Lord (George Gordon) Byron,

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The Importance of Focus
by, Corey Wells

Focus is the act of channeling all our activities into achieving a desired objective. Focused behavior doesn’t just happen by chance. It happens when we take the time necessary to regularly look at our own behavior and then choose what needs to be done each day in order to obtain our goal. This requires a lot of personal discipline and the ability to shield yourself from the distractions of everyday events or other opportunities. Someone who is truly focused does not allow occasional problems or the resistance of others to keep them from pursuing their ultimate goal.

Although setting a desired goal and focusing your efforts to obtain that goal my sound simple, it’s not. As time passes the concentration necessary to keep focused is continually under assault by such things as boredom, new objectives and other possibilities. Many start out with clear objectives, but find themselves inevitably distracted by other emerging and exciting opportunities. It’s easy to get excited about something new and many times people have fallen pray to shifting focus half way through their original goal.

What happens when we lose focus? We start going in multiple directions toward multiple goals and end up doing nothing well. We have essentially invited failure by focusing our efforts on too many things. Success comes from focusing on doing one thing right, rather than doing many things poorly. Stay focused and be successful at whatever you do.

Let’s get started.

1. ” Posterity is as likely to be wrong as anybody else.”
   -Heywood Broun,
2. ” If your life is free of failures, you’re not taking enough risks.”
   -H. Jackson Brown, Jr.,
3. “You must be willing to do the things today others don’t do in order to have the things tomorrow others won’t have. “
   -Les Brown,
4. “He who discommendeth others obliquely commendeth himself.”
   -Sir Thomas Browne,
5. “Ah, but a man’s reach should exceed his grasp,
   Or what’s a heaven for?”
   -Robert Browning,
6. ” “Destiny is not a matter of chance, it is a matter of choice; it is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved.”
   -William Jennings Bryan
7. “The person who tries to live alone will not succeed as a human being. His heart withers if it does not answer another heart. His mind shrinks away if he hears only the echoes of his own thoughts and finds no other inspiration.”
   -Pearl Buck,
8. “Better than a thousand hollow words is one word that brings peace.”
   -Buddha

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Failure Leads to Success
by, Corey Wells

Whenever, wherever you see success you’ll almost always not see the failure that accompanied that success. One of the most famous examples of this is Thomas Edison was working on the light bulb, a reporter found out that Edison had created 10,000 different versions and still could not get it to work. The reporter asked Edison, “How can you keep going after failing 10,000 times? Isn’t that a little ridiculous? Why don’t you just give up?” Edison answered, “You don’t understand, I haven’t failed 10,000 times, I’ve simply succeeded in finding 10,000 ways that definitely won’t work.”

We often fear failure because we view it as an expression of our own self worth. We sometimes think it shows that we’re an inadequate person or we’re bound for a life of mediocrity. However, this is simply not true. Failure, if anything, means that we now have an opportunity to learn. We tried and it didn’t work. So we need to find a different way to proceed until we can master the task at hand. Don’t let one failure deter you from trying something else.

Those who understand the learning opportunity presented by failure, like Edison, look forward to failures because of what they can teach you about yourself and your inner resiliency. When a failure occurs, look at it objectively and ask yourself why. Did you not do everything you could have? Can you retry it from a different angle, or with another mindset? Keep working and you will eventually achieve a favorable result. If you stop learning from your experiences, then you truly have failed.

Let’s get started.

1. “An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.”
   -Henry de Bracton,
2. “Stuff your eyes with wonder . . . live as if you’d drop dead in ten seconds. See the world. It’s more fantastic than any dream made or paid for in factories.”
   -Ray Bradbury,
3. ” The wisest is he that knows only that he knows nothing.”
   -William Cowper Brann
4. “A successful person is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks that others throw at him.”
   -David Brinkley
5. “You can’t be afraid to make errors! You can’t be afraid to be naked before the crowd, because no one can ever master the game of baseball, or conquer it. You can only challenge it.”
   -Lou Brock,
6. ” The surest defense against Evil is extreme individualism, originality of thinking, whimsicality, even-if you will-eccentricity. That is, something that can’t be feigned, faked, imitated; something even a seasoned imposter couldn’t be happy with.”
   -Joseph Brodsky,
7. “A kiss makes the heart young again and wipes out the years.”
   -Rupert Brooke
8. “Life…is not simply a series of exciting new ventures. The future is not always a whole new ball game. There tends to be unfinished business. One trails all sorts of things around with one, things that simply won’t be got rid of.”
   -Anita Brookner,

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Today’s Thought: Play the Game of Life
by, Corey Wells

No matter what your circumstances in life, you probably still have unfulfilled dreams. You sometimes get a nagging feeling that you haven’t accomplished all your goals, and that satisfaction and true fulfillment are continually slipping through your grasp. Why do you think you feel this way?

The problem stems from the reality that many of us are trapped in a game where we view the true meaning of life as the daily survival struggle instead of the ultimate goal of true self-fulfillment. But life should be about more than surviving, it should be about living! There’s much more to life than just living up to the expectations created by society or the ideals that others have set for you.

Isn’t it time to find out what YOU wish for, what standards YOU think are important, what passions YOU have and what dreams YOU see for yourself? Whether you realize it or not, we all have unlimited power inside ourselves that is waiting to be expressed. Not using this power makes us feel a sense of unrest and regret. We all knew how to use this power when we were children. Take a look at some kids today and watch how passionate they are about everything they do. Wouldn’t it be nice if we could reclaim the same zeal for life we used to possess?

If you reclaim your power, you’ll start to regain your passion. When you begin to live your passion, you’ll open yourself up to infinite choices. Most of the limitations we face today are self-imposed. Choose to play the game of life again and a world of new possibilities await.

Let’s get started.

1. “When you want to fool the world, tell the truth. “
   Unknown
2. “It is difficult to live in the present, ridiculous to live in the future, and impossible to live in the past. Nothing is as far away as one minute ago.”
   -Jim Bishop,
3. ” New ideas come into this world somewhat like falling meteors, with a flash and an explosion, and perhaps somebody’s castle-roof perforated.”
   -Sarah Bernhardt,
4. “Avoiding the phrase “I don’t have time…”, will soon help you to realize that you do have the time needed for just about anything you choose to accomplish in life.:
   -Bo Bennett,
5. “We never know the worth of water ’til the well is dry.””
   English Proverb
6. “Sometimes when we are generous in small, barely detectable
   ways it can change someone else’s life forever.”
   Margaret Cho,
7. “To linger in the observation of things other than the self implies a profound conviction of their worth.”
   -Charles-Damian Boulogne,
8. “Few people even scratch the surface, much less exhaust the contemplation of their own experience.”
   -Randolph Silliman Bourne,

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Today’s Thought: Becoming Your Own Person
by, Corey Wells

There comes a time in every successful person’s life when they must stop relying on others and become their own person. The need to establish ourselves as individuals is a necessary and important part of life. This is what drives us to move out of our parent’s home, start our own business and pay our own way in life. The process begins when we decide to become our own authority figure. This requires us to make some pivotal decisions which will set us on a specific path for the rest of our lives.

The methods we choose to initiate this process will determine the type of person we’ll become. Some are so desperate to be on their own that they may compromise their integrity to do so. Personal integrity will help determine your path in life. At certain points in life you’ll be faced with challenging decisions and you’ll need to be guided by your own sense of what is right, and your personal integrity. It’s important to always look at what things mean to you, the people around you and the universe as a whole. You get to choose what is right for you, but there is a cost to breaking your own personal integrity.

If you break your own integrity you may find yourself faced with anxiety or panic attacks latter on in life. You may find that the law of cause and effect will have the things you have chosen to do come back to you in unexpected ways. There is always a price to pay for your actions, sometimes we don’t know that price until it is too late. By living and choosing our own personal integrity we can easily pick the path for our life and stand by our decisions.

When the time comes for you to become your own person, what type of person will you be. One who will do anything necessary to succeed no matter what the cost, or one who will proceed with integrity and kindness toward those who have offered you support and put you in the position to choose. The choices you make will set the tone for the rest of your life. What will you choose?

Let’s get started.

1. “So nothing is ever good or bad unless you think it so, and vice versa. All luck is good luck to the man who bears it with equanimity.”
   -Boethius (Anicius Manlius Severinus),
2. “Thought is generally considered to be a sober and weighty business.”
   -David Bohm,
3. “An expert is a man who has made all the mistakes, which can be made, in a
   very narrow field.”
   -Neils Bohr
4. “Morality’s not practical. Morality’s a gesture. A complicated gesture learnt from books.
   -Robert Bolt,
5. “Humor is a spontaneous, wonderful bit of an outburst that just comes. It’s unbridled, its unplanned, it’s full of suprises.”
   -Erma Bombeck
6. “There are no limits to either time or distance, except as man himself may make them. I have but to touch the wind to know these things.”
   -Hal Borland,
7. “The great thought, the great concern, the great anxiety of men is to restrict, as much as possible, the limits of their own responsibility.”
   -Giosué, Borsi,
8. “A truth that’s told with bad intent
   Beats all the lies you can invent.”
   -William Blake,

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Today’s Thought: Adversity Leads to Growth
by, Corey Wells

We are all human beings that share a common disturbing reality. At some point in our lives we will experience adversity and the resulting pain it causes. Try as we might to hide it, no human being is exempt from this reality. We all must face daily failings and disappointments, and deal with unforeseen circumstances. Everyone has made their fair share of errors and mistakes, but we don’t have to surrender to life’s hardships. It’s not the adversity that matters, but rather, how we deal with it.

Keep in mind that adversity has no life of its own. It only has the energy we give it. The key to dealing with our problems is to first bring them into perspective. Do our adversities really matter in the grand scheme of our lives? When we are in the midst of our own adversities, we tend believe that our problems are the most important problems in the world. Even though our adversities may be important to us, there will always be someone who is dealing with an even worse problem. Once we begin to achieve this realization, we can start to deal with, learn from, and grow through our adversity.

Since problems will always continue to arise now and then, we must not forget that there is something we can learn from every difficult situation. This can’t be over emphasized. If you’re unhappy with where you find yourself in life, then think about what lesson can be learned from this experience. Are you unhappy with your current financial situation, then what needs to be done to improve it? This is the secret for growing through your adversity. When you began to look at it as a true learning opportunity, you can begin to turn adversity into an advantage. Adversity is not an easy thing to deal with, but by doing so, you’ll be able to grow the virtuous qualities within yourself, and develop the inner strength to deal with any future problems.

Let’s get started.

1. “A mode of conduct, a standard of courage, discipline, fortitude and integrity can do a great deal to make a woman beautiful.”
   -Jacqueline Bisset,
2. “Man was formed for society and is neither capable of living alone, nor has the courage to do it.”
   -William Blackstone,
3. “No bird soars too high if he soars with his own wings.”
4. “That’s what learning is, after all; not whether we lose the game, but how we lose and how we’ve changed because of it and what we take away from it that we never had before, to apply to other games. Losing, in a curious way, is winning.”
   -Richard Bach,
5. “If you are patient in one moment of anger, you will escape a hundred days of sorrow.””
6. “The discipline you learn and character you build from setting and achieving a goal can be more valuable than the achievement of the goal itself.:
   -Bo Bennett,
7. “People make a lot of mistakes by feeling compelled to move quickly.”
   Norman Pearlstein
8. “Who can give law to lovers? Love is a greater law to itself.”
   -Boethius (Anicius Manlius Severinus),

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Today’s Thought: Bad Habits
by, Corey Wells

There is probably nothing more difficult in life than eliminating a bad habit. Habits like overeating, a poor attitude or even self-criticism are especially hard to break. Every time we try and fail we end up lowering our self-esteem further. So how can you get rid of those bad habits? Try replacing them with good ones.

Eliminating a bad habit is much easier if you replace it with a more productive good habit. For example, if you have compulsive negative thoughts about yourself try replacing that thought with something positive. Let’s say the thought is, “Why I can’t do anything right?” Try replacing that thought with, “How can I learn how to do this?” Substituting good habits for bad ones can be a very effective way of stopping unwanted behavior and increasing your self-esteem.

If you continue to struggle with overcoming your bad habit, try limiting the practice to a specific time and place. In other words, schedule the habit. If you have a tendency overeat tell yourself that you won’t eat past 8:00 PM. Or if you have a specific diet you want to follow, tell yourself you’ll follow the diet Monday to Saturday and Sunday will be a flexible day for you. Meaning you can have the fast food or cake you have been craving. You’ll be surprised at how effective this can be at helping you quit an undesirable practice.

It’s also very important to reward yourself when you’ve followed through on your plan. So if you go a week without a negative thought, treat yourself to something really enjoy. Just ensure you don’t reward your good behavior with a bad behavor. Rewarding successes greatly affects your chance of converting bad habits into good habits.

Let’s get started.

1. “To talk to someone who does not listen is enough to tense the devil.”
   -Pearl Bailey,
2. ”Obstinate people can be divded into the opinionated, the ignorant, and the boorish.”
   -Aristotle,
3. ” I’d rather regret the things I have done than the things that I haven’t.”
   -Lucille Ball
4. ” The past empowers the present, and the sweeping footsteps leading to this present mark the pathways to the future.”
   -Mary Catherine Bateson
5. ” We must live for the few who know and appreciate us, who judge and absolve us, and for whom we have the same affection and indulgence. The rest I look upon as a mere crowd…from whom there is nothing to be expected but fleeting emotions.”
   -Sarah Bernhardt,
6. ” There is nothing so easy to learn as experience and nothing so hard to apply.”
   -Josh Billings,
7. ” True love is night jasmine, a diamond in darkness, the heartbeat no cardiologist has ever heard. It is the most common of miracles, fashioned of fleecy clouds — a handful of stars tossed into the night sky.”
   -Jim Bishop
8. “a fool learns from experience. A wise man learns from the experience of others.”
   -Otto von Bismarck,

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Today’s Thought: Bad Habits
by, Corey Wells

There is probably nothing more difficult in life than eliminating a bad habit. Habits like overeating, a poor attitude or even self-criticism are especially hard to break. Every time we try and fail we end up lowering our self-esteem further. So how can you get rid of those bad habits? Try replacing them with good ones.

Eliminating a bad habit is much easier if you replace it with a more productive good habit. For example, if you have compulsive negative thoughts about yourself try replacing that thought with something positive. Let’s say the thought is, “Why I can’t do anything right?” Try replacing that thought with, “How can I learn how to do this?” Substituting good habits for bad ones can be a very effective way of stopping unwanted behavior and increasing your self-esteem.

If you continue to struggle with overcoming your bad habit, try limiting the practice to a specific time and place. In other words, schedule the habit. If you have a tendency overeat tell yourself that you won’t eat past 8:00 PM. Or if you have a specific diet you want to follow, tell yourself you’ll follow the diet Monday to Saturday and Sunday will be a flexible day for you. Meaning you can have the fast food or cake you have been craving. You’ll be surprised at how effective this can be at helping you quit an undesirable practice.

It’s also very important to reward yourself when you’ve followed through on your plan. So if you go a week without a negative thought, treat yourself to something really enjoy. Just ensure you don’t reward your good behavior with a bad behavor. Rewarding successes greatly affects your chance of converting bad habits into good habits.

Let’s get started.

1. “To talk to someone who does not listen is enough to tense the devil.”
   -Pearl Bailey,
2. ”Obstinate people can be divded into the opinionated, the ignorant, and the boorish.”
   -Aristotle,
3. ” I’d rather regret the things I have done than the things that I haven’t.”
   -Lucille Ball
4. ” The past empowers the present, and the sweeping footsteps leading to this present mark the pathways to the future.”
   -Mary Catherine Bateson
5. ” We must live for the few who know and appreciate us, who judge and absolve us, and for whom we have the same affection and indulgence. The rest I look upon as a mere crowd…from whom there is nothing to be expected but fleeting emotions.”
   -Sarah Bernhardt,
6. ” There is nothing so easy to learn as experience and nothing so hard to apply.”
   -Josh Billings,
7. ” True love is night jasmine, a diamond in darkness, the heartbeat no cardiologist has ever heard. It is the most common of miracles, fashioned of fleecy clouds — a handful of stars tossed into the night sky.”
   -Jim Bishop
8. “a fool learns from experience. A wise man learns from the experience of others.”
   -Otto von Bismarck,

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Today’s Thought: Doing the Work You Love
by, Corey Wells

Do you remember when you were young and anything you wanted to do seemed possible? What happened to those dreams? Ok, maybe it wasn’t realistic to be a rock star, and maybe you decided there were some negative things about being a policeman. But what happened to your belief system that told you, you could be anything you wanted to be?

As you grow older, you realize that your occupations, or JOBS (Just Over Broke), must provide adequate income to pay your financial obligations. So you stopped dreaming and took the first job that provided you with some sort of financial security. You rationalized this by reasoning that a job is a job and you’ll find fun and happiness after work or on the weekends. But do you really find happiness this way? Wouldn’t it be better if you could work at what you really love to do instead of complaining about your work? Is it still possible to find a job that makes you truly happy? It’s never too late to try to find a job that you actually enjoy doing, but it does take a little time and effort.

First and most importantly, develop the belief system that you can do anything you want to do. This is your life and you have the opportunity to steer it in any direction you choose. Don’t let your fears or our beliefs hold you back. You are the captain of your life and you can do whatever you want to do.
Now, start out by finding what you’re good at and what talents you actually possess. Recall your youth and what you once loved to do. Remember the things that always came easier to you than others. Analyze which values are important and how these could all translate into possible occupations or careers. Be creative and don’t rule something out just because it’s not very “sensible.” Remember, you’re just exploring the possibilities. Once you have some ideas, share this information with those who offer the kind of positions you might be interested in. You might be surprised about the positive response you receive.

Wouldn’t you really rather enjoy what you do? Wouldn’t you prefer an environment where work becomes effortless, instead of draining? A job where you can grow and develop while tapping into your personal creativity. Wouldn’t that make you a better father, mother or spouse in the long run? Allowing yourself to realize your own ambitions can have a positive affect on everyone around you.

Let’s get started.

1. “All men have an instinct for conflict: at least, all healthy men.”
   Hilaire Belloc,
2. “We grow in time to trust the future for our answers.”
   -Ruth Benedict,
3. “Any change, even a change for the better, is always accompanied by drawbacks and discomforts.”
   -Arnold Bennett,
4. “While we are focusing on fear, worry, or hate, it is not possible for us to be experiencing happiness, enthusiasm or love.:
   -Bo Bennett,
5. “As I make my slow pilgrimage through the world, a certain sense of beautiful mystery seems to gather and grow.”
   -A. C. Benson,
6. “Ours is the age of substitutes: instead of language, we have jargon: instead of principles, slogans: and, instead of genuine ideas, bright ideas.”
   -Eric Bently
7. ” What does it take to be a champion? Desire, dedication, determination, concentration and the will to win.”
   -Patty Berg,
8. ” Games are a compromise between intimacy and keeping intimacy away.”
   -Eric Berne,

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Hi everyone, looks like the recording that went out was for episode 316. This should now play episode 317. Sorry for the confusion.

Today’s Thought: There is not choice in commitment.
by, Corey Wells

Simply put, commitment is responsibility. It’s the responsibility to take action on the things you have committed to completing. If you have given a commitment to another individual, they will expect you to do what you say. If the commitment is to yourself, you will end up feeling unsatisfied if you don’t follow through. The best advice I ever received was the following:

“There is no choice in commitment! You’re committed therefore you go.”

What do I mean by there’s no choice in commitment. It’s really as simple as it sounds. If you’ve made a commitment to do something than you don’t have the choice, or flexibility, to do something else. For instance, if I’m in sales and I commit to making 10 outbound sales calls a day. I must complete that activity. There’s no option, or choice, to do 5 today and 15 tomorrow. If I’m committed I complete those calls.

Failure to keep commitments to others can lead to damaged relationships. Failure to keep commitments to yourself can lead to an unfulfilled life. Every unfulfilled commitment to yourself does a little more damage to your self esteem. Unfulfilled commitments may be the difference between a fully rewarding life, or a life where you just simply get by. It will definitely mean that your furture will not proceed in the direction that it may have gone if you had realized your commitment.

Committing doesn’t mean you have no doubts, or fears. The best commitments are those made in spite of these fears. If you’ve made the decision to do something positive for your life don’t let your fears hold you back. If you’re committed, you will do it!

Making and keeping commitments is usually the difference between excellence and mediocrity. If you want a fulfilling life, make and take responsibility for you life’s commitments. With commitment, anything is possible. Without it, you’re going to leave a lot up to chance.

Remember, there is no choice in commitment! You’re committed therefor you go!

1. “Happiness is that state of consciousness which proceeds from the achievement of one’s values.”
   AYN RAND,
2. “Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes.”
   OSCAR WILDE,
3. “Be happy while you’re living, for you’re a long time dead.”
   Scottish Proverb
4. “In the face of an obstacle which is impossible to overcome, stubbornness is stupid.”
   -Simone de Beauvoir,
5. ” Morality is character and conduct such as is required by the circle or community in which the man’s life happens to be placed. It shows how much good men require of us.”
   -Henry Ward Beecher,
6. “To say that a man is vain means merely that he is pleased with the effect he produces on other people. A conceited man is satisfied with the effect he produces on himself.”
   -Max Beerbohm,
7. “let every man do that which is right, strive with all his might towards the goal which can never be obtained, develop to the last breath the gifts with which the gracious Creator has endowed him, and never cease to learn. For life is short, art eternal.”
   -Ludwig van Beethoven
8. ” When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.”
   -Alexander Graham Bell

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